31 March 2016

Batman v Superman

There is a reason I prefer Marvel over DC. Namely that DC has just been making everything dark and gritty. I'm just not a fan of dark and gritty superheroes.

A warning... there will be spoilers for this and for Man of Steel (which I have not seen, but know enough to spoil things).

Okay, so who decided that Superman, the literal all-around good guy, was dark and gritty? Cause honestly it doesn't make sense. He's the good guy and everyone loves him.

Except the people in Batman v Superman. And that's the main plot of this movie. Because of what happened in Man of Steel, namely the leveling of half of Metropolis, Superman is not the hero people want.

Bruce Wayne, who happened to be in Metropolis at the time of the leveling, is one of the main opponents of the Man of Steel. But he's busy doing Batman things in Gotham.

Side point, has Gotham always been "across the bay" from Metropolis? Cause that just seems too much of a coincidence. Much like the fact that both the heroes mom's are named Martha.

I would try to go over plot in this review, but it was just all over the place. So let's instead talk about characters. Henry Cavill's Superman is so dry. I understand he's an alien, but he's been on Earth for his entire life. He's never really know how life was like on Krypton, so stop making him so... personality-less.

Ben Affleck was also a bit one-note, but honestly, I love him too much to complain. Thanks, movie, for the unnecessary shirtless workout scene.

Gal Gadot was great and needed to be in the movie more.

Jesse Eisenberg was my favorite part. He can play crazy really well. And this Lex Luthor is bat-shit insane.

So, overall, I wasn't too impressed. It was mostly confusing. I liked the little cameos for the other members of the Justice League and I cannot wait for the Aquaman movie.

Frankly, I just think that DC has to stop focusing on it's two main players and bring up the rest of the roster. Yes, I know, the last time they did, it flopped. But that's what you get for doing Green Lantern before Wonder Woman. We all just want a Wonder Woman movie.

Make it happen!

01 March 2016

Edutainment is my new favorite word

I tried thinking of a topic that I could research. You see, I like a lot of edutainment-al channels on YouTube and I would like to slowly become one.

But I can't think of which topic I would be best for.

I like so many things and I find so many things interesting that there is just too much to choose from. And moreover there are already so many edutainment-al channels that cover everything I would want to cover.

So what new twist can I bring to things?

Of course I could also just write my scripts out for the blog. But again, I need a topic.

So what I'm really saying is... SOMEBODY GIVE ME A TOPIC TO WRITE ABOUT!!!


18 February 2016

Kissing in the Rain

Normally I don't like romantic things because they are dumb.

Yes, you can quote me on that.

But I just watched this short YouTube series and it's absolutely adorable.

So, loyal readers, watch these videos as they are cute.

And because of this, and some other things, I have started working again on my big romance novel. Don't worry, it will be full of cliche dribble.

Oh, there is a second half to this series with different actors. While still cute, I didn't find them as endearing as these ones. But they are still worth a watch.

And since I'm pimping out my blog to a good chunk of their videos, go check out Shipwrecked Comedy's kickstarter - Edgar Allan Poe's Murder Mystery Dinner Party 

14 February 2016

Adventures in Baking!


Today is Valentine's Day. 
Therefore, my aunt and I decided to make cookies.
It turned out a lot more hilarious that we anticipated.

It's just cookie dough.
You see anything else, blame your own dirty mind.
So... yeah... 
Note to readers: when making a pink cookie... you should probably use a lot more food coloring.

They just need some frosting.
But everything turned out alright in the end.

I really don't have anything else to say. I just wanted to share the laughs we had while baking today. 

06 February 2016

WANTED: One piano player to work with shy soprano

I am looking for an accompanist.

Let's take a step back.

I consider myself a singer. I went to school for voice. I like singing. All that jazz and whatnot.

However, I have terrible stage fright. I don't know what it is about singing on stage, but I just can't do it. I clam up. I squeak. I am just pretty bad.

However however, I wish to belong to the Sarah Brightman School of Performance. This is something I came up with several years ago. If you don't know Sarah Brightman, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

Just LOOK at her!
This is Sarah Brightman and she is my queen. -->

She has a gorgeous voice and never wears pants. Which is why I joke that the SBSoP's motto is "Cantate magnum, sine aliqua." That translates to "Sing big, without pants."

I'm funny.

Anyway, I'm getting off track. I am thinking about setting up a vocal recital for myself because I never got to do one in college. It's a long story, but that doesn't matter now.

What matters is that I would like to do one now and I need an accompanist, but the ones I know do not live around here, and the ones that live around here I do not know.

Sad face!

So if you know someone, please let me know. I'm looking to do some standards, some pop tunes, a few musical numbers, and maybe an aria if I feel up to it.

04 February 2016

Grandma's 86th Birthday Bash!

So sweet ol' grandma-ma turned 86 this past Monday.
We had a party for her on Sunday as Mom had to work and I had to babysit the nieces that Monday.

Here are some pictures...

J and P coloring.
Photobombing J!
Me and gram-gram
Mom and her grandkids
Aunt P and grams
Gram-ma-ma and Mom
GG and the nieces
And one more for show.

I know I've been writing a lot about my grandmother recently, but seriously she's really the only thing going on in my life right now.

And that makes me a little sad.

On the other hand... I may have gotten the perfect picture of her.


30 January 2016

Update on grandma and her foot

Sometimes you just need wine.
See... lots better.
So it's been a month now since grandma's foot fiasco and I'm happy to report is mostly healed.

That being said, my relationship with my grandmother is on the downwards slope again. It always seems to have this same rollercoaster of emotions with her. We have a fight, usually money themed, and we just seem bitch at each other for a couple weeks. I take a weekend to just get away. Then when I get back she's all "you are the best granddaughter ever" and we are good. For a few months.

Then the cycle begins again.

It sucks not having a good relationship with your only living grandparent.

It sucks worse when people think you don't care.

08 January 2016

Friday Fun-times - sculpting

I've been sculpting little trolls recently. They are cute in a weird sort of way.

So far I have made 2 of a set of 4 and one extra.

Here are pictures!
This is Askr [pronounced Oscar] and he is the Spring Guardian. He is actually the first one I made.

This is Yuki the Ice Princess.

I have plans for Summer and Autumn... well, kinda. All I know for certain is that Summer will be lying on her stomach with a dragonfly on her feet. And Autumn will have fallen leaves... duh.

I just need to buy more clay.

And random crafty bits for decorations.

Now, this one is not completely finished. He doesn't even have a name yet. I've been calling him Neo because he kinda looks like Neapolitan ice cream, but I don't really like it. He's definitely an ice cream troll. I don't know quite how else to decorate him yet. I feel like he should be sitting in a cloud of whipped cream, but how would I do that?

Anyway, those are my babies.

06 January 2016

Workday Wednesday - Fanfics

I find that most of my stories these days start as fanfics. What’s a fanfic, you ask? Well, it’s a story that takes place in a pre-existing story-verse or uses someone else’s characters. For example, [and I can’t believe this would be the best known example] 50 Shades of Grey started out as a Twilight fanfic. The author took the characters Edward and Bella and said “what if I make these two have all sorts of sex?”

Actually, most fanfics that are out there are basically “what if [insert two or more characters] had sex?”

I don’t write that kind of fanfic.

I write “author inserted” fanfic.

I write stories where the main character is new to the story-verse and is a perfect version of what I would do in the story. The best example I can think of of this is Dante’s Inferno. I mean he made Virgil, an actual person, his best bud and guide.

The first story I ever finished [because I have a problem] was an Andromeda fanfic. It’s actually where my internet persona is named. Enigma Harper. My main character in an Andromeda fanfic.
Here’s an excerpt…

You would not believe how much I loved this show.
Andromeda was basically just Canadian Star Trek.
And yes, that's Kevin Sorbo.
After classes I toured the space station. It was huge. It was like a small planet. My favorite part of the tour was the docking bay. Ships came everywhere to get supplies. All the different beings that got out of the ships were amazing. There were several ships that I wouldn't mind travelling on. I started to dream about the many places I would go. I must've been quite out of it because I finally snapped out when someone tapped my shoulder.
"Um. excuse me, miss. I've been all around the galaxy and I have never seen a finer looking alien."
"What? Finer? I don't understand your..." I glanced at the round metallic disk inserted into the side of his neck, "AI slang."
Now he looked confused. "AI? I ain't no robot, lady, if I can call you that. I am all human. Straight from Mother Earth, herself."
"Well, I'm sorry if I offended you. I couldn't tell with that thing in your neck."
"What? My data port? This is really useful. I can connect online with my ship and go to the source of any problem."
"You have a ship? Which one?"
He pointed to a beautiful ship. I don't think I could describe it justly.
"That's her. The Andromeda Ascendant."
"Named after the chained maiden in Greek mythology. Was offered as a sacrifice to the Cetus to save Ethiopia."
He stared at me, slack jawed.
"What?" I looked around. "Did I do something wrong?"
"No. I just never met an alien that knew so much about ancient Earth culture."
"Oh. I know much about every culture in the galaxy. Like the infamous Krikket Wars and ... Why do you have that look on your face?"
"I was just thinking. Do you know anything about the Commonwealth?"
"Just that is was a great thing until it fell, and that some 300 year old High Guard captain is trying to pull it back together."
"Where are you staying? I need to tell Dylan about you."
"At the University, in the Lowi Wing. My name is Enigma." I held out my hand.
"Harper," he shook it, "do you mind visitors?"
"No, not at all. I live by myself."
"I'll see you tonight then."
He walked off. I think he was planning something. He wasn't too bad looking. Better than most back home. I decided to write Mother about my day.

Keep in mind I wrote this … 15 years ago. Goodness, has it really been that long? Anyway, as you can see I borrowed a lot from what was influencing me at the time. Greek mythology and Douglas Adams. And I didn’t edit any of the spelling errors. Believe me, there are a bunch of errors all over the place.

I hope you learned a bit today. If anything, I hope you enjoyed my humble beginnings.

Harper, OUT! 

04 January 2016

Family Friday... on a Monday

Grandma's first selfie.
This is my grandmother. You are seeing this picture first because the rest of the pictures will be graphic in nature and I needed a buffer picture so my links were not immediately accompanied with a gross picture.

Anyway, my grandmother is 85 years old. She is borderline diabetic [this is a complicated statement], hard of hearing, has macular degeneration, peripheral nerve damage in her feet, and is a staunch Democrat. She is mobile, but needs a walker and has a lot of difficulty making it up the three stairs in her home.

She is adamant about living independently. She currently lives across the road from us in her ranch style home. It is all one level [save for the three steps it take to get to the attached garage] and even her washing machine is on the main floor.

I'm telling you all this as a background.

December 21st we [myself and my mother] get a call from the nice lady [and family friend] that helps grandma clean her house. She saw that grandma had an open wound on the back of her foot. When asked about it grandma said she first noticed a blister back there on Saturday [the 19th] and to not tell us about it because we'll just worry over nothing.

This is a normal statement from Grandma.

So naturally, she called us and told us about it and we went over right away to look at it. We found this. For size reference... grandma wears a 10WW shoe.

Grandma assured us that she was fine and didn't want us to worry about her.

We didn't listen to her and took her to the emergency room.

Once the slipper was removed we noticed something else.

The wound was just the top of a popped blister. A blister that measured 4.5 cm tall and 6 cm wide. That is a Post-It note sized blister... that we only were just told about!

Now I know that at least one person is out there going, "Why don't you do daily checks on her?"

We do... I do.

Grandma is a special case. She is kinda paranoid. Like "the government is trying to steal all my money" paranoid. She is considered "too rich" to qualify for an in-home care program and "too poor" to move to a care facility. So she has me as a care provider and our family friend as a maid. I take her to appointments, get her groceries, make meals, and pick up her prescriptions. If she needs something from me, she calls me up and I go right over. She has a Life Alert necklace [that she keeps on her walker because... reasons?] incase she can't get to her phone.

But mainly it is her decision to do anything. And she likes to prove this by not telling us about her ailments for a few days. Even when we are sitting in front of her.

So the ER doctor says that the blister is probably from either her cellulitis or her lymphedema.

In other words... no big deal?

They send us down to wound care for debridement... aka the removal of dead tissue so the wound can heal. It looks like this.

Just so you know, I'm apparently a ninja when I take pictures. The doctor didn't even know. But I knew I needed to be able to tell other family members what was going on.

So I became the Ninja Photographer!

Long story short, Grandma is healing well. Actually she only had to go to 2 debridement appointments. The doctor said she was healing nicely and that all she needed was someone to change her bandages.

That would be me.